Gay and married I knew I had homosexual desires in my early teens but I was brainwashed by social preferences and scared to submit to them even though I had a few guys try to seduce me. I wanted to be, and made all attempts to appear macho to the public and I tried to and succeeded in being popular with several girls and wound up married to one that I thought was a prized perfect sex partner and I felt macho thinking guys admired me for having the girl that several seemed to lust after.
I wasn’t even jealous when guys came on to her especially cute ones that I liked having around. And as our sex became routine and burned out I would visualize how the guys I admired would look while doing sex and so when these two guys that were constantly in our midst and one especially that kept on bragging about how sexy she looked to him helped brain wash me into wondering how she would enjoy sex with this hot stud. I actually visualized his body in motion during our sex to satisfy my discre...
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