When youre divorced, 34 years old, and you have a gorgeous 25 year old blond hunk for a boyfriend, you do anything to hold on to him. So for Rays birthday, I gave him something special. I sent myself to him as a birthday gift.
I work for a company that delivers singing greetings for birthdays and holidays. So, on Friday evening, I was sitting in the back of one of our delivery vans wearing only a red bow around my neck, a pair of shoes, and a raincoat.
The driver announced Id be delivered next. I took off my coat and shoes, exposing my white flesh in the dimly lit van, and climbed into one of the companys large boxes, which Id decorated like a present. I hunched down into a squatting position and pulled the lid down tight on the box.
I felt the van slow down, and just creep along. The driver was new to the company, and to Pittsburgh. I assumed he was making sure of the right address. After about five minutes, the van stopped...
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